fic: the weight of fatherhood
Nov. 6th, 2020 09:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vvitchsdesireao3 || wattpad || ffnet
Title: the weight of fatherhood
Fandom: Twisted Wonderland
Rating: G
Wordcount: 292
Summary: Some nights - when he’s particularly awake for no reason, soothing a teething Malleus -, Lilia can’t help but think that he does not deserve to be a father.
Some nights - when he’s particularly awake for no reason, soothing a teething Malleus -, Lilia can’t help but think that he does not deserve to be a father. His voice, raspy and rough, is tired. There are times, especially like these, when all he can do is cannot soothe a child, that all Lilia wants is to run away, flee into battle and let himself be consumed by it.
But then, who would take care of Malleus? Who would make sure he was clothed and fed and happy? If not Lilia, who? So he stayed, patted Malleus’ back until he burped and kept singing.
Lilia himself… Had been raised by no one, he guessed. There wasn’t a point in his life he could remember having a parental figure, had no one wipe his tears and make sure his wounds did not infect. So if he could do this little thing for Malleus, fine, he would, even if it meant staying up late with no respite. It was like babying himself, like rewriting his past, like being the parent Lilia did not remember having.
Malleus calmed himself suddenly, pulling at Lilia’s hair, chewing on it. It seemed to soothe him, somehow. Well, if it worked, it worked. He laid down in bed carefully, letting Malleus chew on his hair, making sure he wouldn’t choke on it, watching the little boy.
One day, he realized with sudden sadness, no warning to these feelings that suddenly filled his chest with melancholy, this boy would grow up and leave him alone. Malleus would venture into the world, leaving Lilia behind.
He’d be fine, though, knowing he had raised -
Malleus pulled at his hair, breaking his line of thought with a giggle, and Lilia smiled softly at him.
Title: the weight of fatherhood
Fandom: Twisted Wonderland
Rating: G
Wordcount: 292
Summary: Some nights - when he’s particularly awake for no reason, soothing a teething Malleus -, Lilia can’t help but think that he does not deserve to be a father.
Some nights - when he’s particularly awake for no reason, soothing a teething Malleus -, Lilia can’t help but think that he does not deserve to be a father. His voice, raspy and rough, is tired. There are times, especially like these, when all he can do is cannot soothe a child, that all Lilia wants is to run away, flee into battle and let himself be consumed by it.
But then, who would take care of Malleus? Who would make sure he was clothed and fed and happy? If not Lilia, who? So he stayed, patted Malleus’ back until he burped and kept singing.
Lilia himself… Had been raised by no one, he guessed. There wasn’t a point in his life he could remember having a parental figure, had no one wipe his tears and make sure his wounds did not infect. So if he could do this little thing for Malleus, fine, he would, even if it meant staying up late with no respite. It was like babying himself, like rewriting his past, like being the parent Lilia did not remember having.
Malleus calmed himself suddenly, pulling at Lilia’s hair, chewing on it. It seemed to soothe him, somehow. Well, if it worked, it worked. He laid down in bed carefully, letting Malleus chew on his hair, making sure he wouldn’t choke on it, watching the little boy.
One day, he realized with sudden sadness, no warning to these feelings that suddenly filled his chest with melancholy, this boy would grow up and leave him alone. Malleus would venture into the world, leaving Lilia behind.
He’d be fine, though, knowing he had raised -
Malleus pulled at his hair, breaking his line of thought with a giggle, and Lilia smiled softly at him.
