fic: the secrets hidden in your heart
Mar. 21st, 2020 01:53 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vvitchsdesireTitle: the secrets hidden in your heart
Fandom: Dangan Ronpa: Happy Trigger Havoc
Relationship: Sayaka Maizono/Mukuro Ikusaba/
Wordcount: 3160
Summary: "I thought you were a soldier?" Sayaka whispered, with more daggers in her voice than needed. Mukuro looked away.
"It pays well?" Mukuro replied, and Sayaka gave her a long sigh. "Listen, I know it's not ideal, but it'll be just a few short weeks until your promotional cycle ends. Then we can go back to just being classmates."
"We've been having trouble keeping the crowds away from you, girls. Especially you, Sayaka, so," Started the manager, giving Himeko's cleavage a good eyeful. If Sayaka would not be hit if she slouched, she would've, just to avoid his gaze. Unfortunately, the rules had been taught to her in blood and bruises, and Sayaka obeyed them. "So we hired a bodyguard."
Sayaka knew the bodyguards the manager (who was now staring at Satomi's tights; the next one to be put under that leech's gaze was herself, she knew) liked to hire, and did an internal sigh, already readying herself for the abuse. Between the fans and the bodyguards, she almost preferred the fans. Almost.
His gaze landed on Sayaka, centered between her too-exposed breasts, and Sayaka held his gaze, steady and cold.
If she hadn't done so much to get where she was, she would've dropped out and gone solo; it felt bad to abandon her group mates, although she knew that they'd do the same, given the chance. This tension, taut and ready to explode, suited them just fine. It was what made their music so good.
"Please greet your bodyguard." He said, and opened the door to show -
Mukuro Ikusaba zeroed on Sayaka almost immediately, and Sayaka felt herself blush, sitting even more upright, looking into her classmate. The manager was speaking, but Sayaka wasn't listening, too busy feeling how short her idol clothes were.
It was part of the job, and it was one thing to be seen at a distance, in the big screen, as she danced and sang; another whole thing was to be seen at a close distance by her classmate. Fans didn't count; Sayaka didn't know them personally, didn't have math on Mondays with them.
(Makoto also didn't count. Sayaka had decided that on the first day of classes; he was her friend first and her fan second)
The manager finished his monologue, and both Ayaka and Kyouko went after him as he left, probably ready to discuss how little lines they had on the most recently released song (they were dancers, not singers; Sayaka avoided a well-deserved eye roll), while Himiko and Satomi leaned into each other, taking off their phones from the hidden pockets of their clothes and scrolling through their Twitter feeds, which left Sayaka alone with Mukuro. She rose up, dusted her too-short skirt and smiled too sweetly at Mukuro, who seemed to want to be anywhere but there.
"I thought you were a soldier?" Sayaka whispered, with more daggers in her voice than needed. Mukuro looked away.
"It pays well?" Mukuro replied, and Sayaka gave her a long sigh. "Listen, I know it's not ideal, but it'll be just a few short weeks until your promotional cycle ends. Then we can go back to just being classmates."
Sayaka could work with that.
"So, can I ask why you're following me?" Sayaka asked, walking forward without looking at Mukuro, who was exactly four steps behind her on the stairs.
"Well, might as well start working sooner, if we're going to the same place." Mukuro replied, casually breaking a camera from a man. At least she assumed it was a man, but they tended to be. "Besides, I'm your bodyguard."
Sayaka looked back, and saw Mukuro giving a cellphone a swift kick, with a man scrambling after it a moment later. She kept walking.
"Technically, you're the bodyguard of the whole group." She pointed out, and Mukuro shrugged.
"The whole group doesn't go to Hope's Peak, do they?" Mukuro grabbed Sayaka's arm, bringing her closer, and leaned in. "By the way, there's another man following you today as well. I'm going to ask you to crouch in three minutes so I can deck him in the face, and I'm going to tap your shoulder to let you know. Is there a problem with this?"
Sayaka could feel the warmth of her breath against her ear, and blushed. She was an idol, had done way more than this, and yet -
"Yeah, sure, no problem."
Maybe Sayaka had a small crush on Mukuro. Maybe she wanted to date her, to see Mukuro smiling at her and only her. Was it anyone's business? Well, no, but if the fans heard about it she'd be expelled out of the company. They did tend to sell that "available girlfriend for you!" image, after all.
"Anyway, I don't quite recall you being, you know, for sale." Sayaka started, and Mukuro cocked her head, a step back, looking around. She was playing with something in her pocket; Sayaka's instinct suggested it was a knife, the one she saw Mukuro twirl, absentmindedly, during classes.
Mukuro shrugged, elbowing away someone wearing an Ayaka shirt.
"Staying still is boring." Sayaka couldn't help but giggle at that. "What?"
"You sounded a bit like Junko there." Mukuro sighed, and tapped Sayaka's shoulder. Pretending that something fell, Sayaka crouched, and heard a sickeningly crushing noise, accompanied by a yelp and a low, muttered threat that made her heart race.
She stayed staring at the grey pavement for a seeming long time, just listening to Mukuro deal with seemingly a lot more fans than previously expected.
"Hey, we're good." Mukuro said, a hand on Sayaka's shoulder. Sayaka rose up, dusting her clothes, and Mukuro held a hand to her elbow; even through the fingerless glove and the fabric of the Hope's Peak uniform, she could feel the warmth present. "Sorry, I didn't see the other five men. Man, you girls got it bad, huh?"
Sayaka smiled at her, softly, warmly, and if she strained her eyes she'd swear Mukuro had blushed a little.
"Yeah, but you're here to help, aren't you?" Mukuro smiled at that, but said nothing; Sayaka also did not reply.
Sayaka could see Mukuro, in the corner of her eye, as she sung and danced during the Tokyo Dome show. Sure, she should be paying attention to what was going on, but she wasn't the Ultimate Idol for no reason. She could, if she wanted, mentally check out of any show, and still have it be a pitch perfect performance. She didn't even need playback!
Mukuro, as far as Sayaka could see, seemed to be having fun; she had got from someone a penlight, and had it on Sayaka's color, even though it was Kyouko's part. That was sweet of her, but also showed an incredibly rude lack of manners. There was an order to be followed, after all.
When the show was over, most of the girls passed by Mukuro with no aknowledgment; Sayaka hung back, and stood by her.
"I think I get why it's just Ultimate Idol, and not Ultimate Idol group." Mukuro commented, and Sayaka shrugged.
"I'd reply, but my contract states I can't speak ill of my label mates." The other girl looked at her, leaned in - her skin was almost cold, refreshing, against Sayaka's sweat-flushed skin. The two started walking, slowly, to the backroom, their conversation punctuated by Sayaka thanking the managing crew as she went.
"But off the record?" Mukuro asked, and Sayaka gave her a mock glare that didn't even seem to bother the soldier. Sayaka then smiled at her, and Mukuro smiled back.
"Why, miss Ikusaba, you seem like you want me to get in trouble." That made Mukuro jump, blushing in a sort of shame Sayaka rarely saw and that made her intrigued.
"Wait, wait, no, I don't, I swear, it's..." Sayaka laughed, and Mukuro bit her tongue. "Geez, don't scare me."
"Sorry, it was a low-hanging fruit." Sayaka leaned in, looking around and seeing no one. "If I'm honest, yeah, there's a reason we aren't Ultimate Idol Group. They aren't as good as me."
"Just like I'm not Ultimate Mercenary Group, I guess." Mukuro had a nice smile, Sayaka couldn't help but notice. She wished Mukuro smiled more. "But that's more because my comrades were, how do you say…"
"Old?"
"Yeah, not exactly high school age. They'd be more teachers, but I don't quite think you would benefit from their lessons." They reached the backroom, the ajar door leaking snippets of conversation as her group mates undid the heavy dresses of today's concert. "Anyway, you're going home today, or to the dorms?"
"To the dorms." Hope's Peak had a few dorms, available to students upon reservation, and Sayaka liked to lounge there after a concert; it felt warmer than her house, at least. Maybe it was the sound of other people, just outside her grasp, or was the fact that her house would be as empty as she had left it, and Sayaka, still so full of borrowed excitement, did not want to lose it to the emptiness of her own room.
She was never able to sleep well there: the loneliness always ended up getting to her, and Sayaka often found herself crying, eating ice cream while watching late night shows on the television of the living room. She couldn't bear the silence well, and having her phone playing music felt like losing a war she did not know she was waging. Makeup did wonders to cover up the bags underneath her eyes.
The dorm was no better, if she was honest, but she slept a few hours, at least: something about the presence of other people, just a thin wall away, soothed her enough to get Sayaka three or four hours of sleep.
Mukuro nodded, and stationed herself in front of the door as Sayaka entered the backroom.
"You're staying in the dorms as well?" Sayaka asked, grabbing from the entrance a room key. Mukuro had greeted the dorm mother warmly enough to make her wonder, and so, she voiced her question.
Mukuro blushed, fidgeting a little: it was endearing to see her flushed.
"Uh, yeah, me and Junko don't have, you know, exactly a place to stay in." A pause. Sayaka rose an eyebrow. "I got kicked out after my little Fenrir stunt, and Junko… Well."
"Junko's Junko, I got it." Sayaka nodded, thanking the woman soon after. Her bag was heavy on her hands, full of her books to study and the extra clothes she needed. Maybe it just felt heavier because she was tired, trudging upstairs (someone had broken the elevator, and the Ultimate Mechanic was already repairing it) with Mukuro, who seemed alright, always a step behind. As if anyone would've been able to follow her inside Hope's Peak.
Her feet slipped on the stairs, and Sayaka let out a yelp, already foreseeing the cancellation of their Japan tour, the end of her contract, and - and Mukuro grabbed her, feet planted firmly on the stairwell so she wouldn't fall, eyes a pair of lilac daggers, centered solely on making sure Sayaka was well.
Her heart was beating faster than a racing car. She had to defuse the mood, if not for Mukuro, for herself.
"You know, I think the others can see you prefer me?" Sayaka said, and Mukuro blinked, looking at her. "I mean, I heard Himeko mentioning it."
"Well, we all have our favorites. I'm no exception." Mukuro straightened Sayaka, and looked at the bag, clothes and books thrown on the floor. Sayaka would've heard what she had said next, but she was busy gloating inside to herself that she was Mukuro's favorite.
Shaking her head to herself, Sayaka started to pick her things up.
"It was a nice concert. First time I saw it from the backstage, though." Mukuro continued, and Sayaka dropped the book she had been picking, looking at Mukuro - who seemed flustered, dropping the books she had picked up. "I said that out loud?"
"Yeah?" Mukuro did a low whine, putting her face in her hands, trying to hide a blush that went up to her ears. It was music to Sayaka's ears, who hid a smile by bending down to . "Oh my, I'd never thought…!"
"The joke writes itself, doesn't it? The Ultimate Soldier enjoys girly things." Mukuro passed a hand through her hair. Sayaka finished repacking her bag, and looked at the other girl.
Mukuro seemed lost in thought, despairing at the thought of her secret being known. Sayaka blinked slowly - she was an idol, why would liking idols be a bad thing? She was sure any soldier enjoyed seeing a pretty young girl dance around in skimpy clothes, as gross as it was. But Mukuro was Mukuro, and not some random older soldier.
"And why would that be a bad thing? You like what you like, but honestly, I'm gonna scold you for your bad form. You're supposed to change the penlight according to who's singing, dummy." Sayaka huffed, using a finger to stab at Mukuro's arm. "Honestly! You're lucky I think Ayaka didn't see it, she would've thrown a fit midstage!"
Mukuro blinked, once, twice, thrice, and then opened up a smile that could've rivaled the sun.
"Really? Guess you'll have to teach me more, then." Sayaka could feel the heat bloom on her cheeks, warmer than any sort of borrowed excitement. "But maybe tomorrow. We have class tomorrow, and you just came out of a five hour show."
Sayaka nodded, barely remembering that as she kept the trek upstairs, treasuring Mukuro's smile.
Mukuro elbowed a fan in the face with that cold look she had learned to adore, and Sayaka offered them a fake apologetic look as Kyouko shouted a "sorry!" that sounded badly reharsed. International fans were always so messy to deal with.
"She's such a brute." Himeko muttered, and Sayaka gave her a glare, hidden by the crowd. Himeko looked back at her. "What? It's true. I'm not going to mince my words just because she's your classmate, Sayaka."
"She's the only one between you and a camera between your legs, though." Ayaka piped in, before smiling to a fansite, and dropping out of the conversation to chat with one of her superfans that followed her everywhere. Himeko huffed, high and mighty, and let herself share whispered words with Kyouko.
If Sayaka fell behind them to walk by Mukuro's side - she made a mental note to check the Twitter drama later -, and the soldier seemed like she had been pinched by a personification of jetlag.
"I hate long distance traveling." Mukuro said, and Sayaka cocked her head.
"Not used to it?" Sayaka asked, as a reply, and Mukuro looked at her as she gave a swift kick to the ankles to a fan breaking the lines. "I mean, as a mercenary, weren't you being deployed everywhere?"
Mukuro shook her head, and helped Sayaka squeeze through a particularly tight fan passage by grabbing her hand, taking her amidst the fans.
"No. Fenrir tried to make us have the next assignment as close as possible geographically. It was their way of saving on flight costs." Mukuro rolled her eyes, biting back a yawn, and Sayaka drank her in. Her hair was all messy, and she still had a faint red line from where she had rested her head against during her sleep.
She was beautiful, so to say. Sayaka could barely believe her luck.
"And where you usually were stationed, soldier?" Sayaka drawled the last word, which made Mukuro trip on her own feet: cute.
"Europe." Mukuro did not elaborate, and Sayaka, who had finally got outside, did not ask more, shoving herself inside the tour bus. She gave a look back to Mukuro as she rose the stairs of the bus, and the girl seemed half in awe with her.
She smiled at Mukuro, pulling her up, and closed the door in the fan's face, the flash from the camera they were holding making her as dizzy as Mukuro made her feel. The Twitter fanwar to follow would be a nice and light night reading.
"Sayaka!" Mukuro called, a moment before the show began. Sayaka broke the formation, ignoring Satomi's whine, and went to where the soldier was, a few feet away, amidst the blustering that always happened before a show. She had a penlight, and it was on Sayaka's color. "Hey, can you teach me to change this thing's color again? I didn't quite grasp it."
Sayaka sighed, but it was in a good-natured way; she squeezed through the assistants who bustled back and forth to make the concert perfect, and picked up the penlight from Mukuro's hands gently.
"See, you press this button to turn it on and off, for two seconds," Sayaka explained, going through the knowledge she had from years of work, and she saw that Mukuro was paying attention.
Sayaka did find it odd that Mukuro suddenly couldn't work how the penlight worked: her color was the last one to appear in the programming of these things. Mukuro had to know how to work it out, if she managed to arrive in Sayaka's color.
Right?
"And don't forget to change the colors between members, or the Japanese fans are going to kill you." Sayaka huffed, raising her head, and Mukuro gave her a quick peck in the lips - barely enough for her brain to register more than a blurry of movement and warmth on her skin. "W - What?"
The signal the show was starting sounded, breaking Sayaka from her reverie, and Mukuro picked the penlight gently from Sayaka's hand.
"Don't you have a show to be doing, miss Ultimate Idol?" Mukuro asked, and Sayaka huffed at her as a stagehand started to usher her to the stage. Satomi was already having a nervous breakdown.
"We'll talk about this later, Mukuro." Sayaka hissed, and Mukuro, smiling, nodded.
"Can't wait."
Sayaka made it through the fan meeting events, through the ride back to the hotel they were sharing, with Mukuro giving her a knowing smile every time Sayaka looked. She was sure her Twitter feed would be sizzling hot with all the previews, and her mentions, a nightmare.
She never had felt luckier by having a whole room just to herself, forcing Mukuro inside and trapping her against the door. She rose an eyebrow at that, but Sayaka, hands on the wall, couldn't care.
"What's up with that?" Mukuro drawled, smiling too much. Sayaka, whose patience was paper-thin, huffed.
"With what?"
"You're - you're not as smooth as you think you are, Mukuro." Sayaka hissed, and Mukuro cocked her head. She was blushing, no matter how cool she wanted to look.
"Yeah? Seems to be working on you, though." Mukuro kissed her, softly. Sayaka reciprocated the kiss, and then let go, feeling the heat on her cheeks grow to an unbearable level. "You should rest. Tomorrow we have another flight."
"And you're going to leave me like this? Come on. My bed is big enough." Sayaka barely blinked at her proposition, but Mukuro had her ears going red. "What? It's just sleeping. Your room is half a world away. Sleep with me."
Mukuro sighed, but nodded, and the two padded to bed, falling asleep in each other's arms.
Sayaka had never slept better than when she did in Mukuro's arms.
